What does it mean to love yourself?
Some cringe at the phrase, I have recieved varrying definitions to include:
"People who love themselves are narcassists"
"Loving yourself is selfish"
"You should love others, not yourself"
The list goes on. I encourage each person to make their own choices, and determine meanings in life for themself, but I will share my take on this "self love" concept.
To love yourself means (to me)that you are happy in your skin. You live in relationship to yourself daily, learning about yourself and being open to the changes and challenges that you will encounter. Loving yourself means to be your advocate, your own best friend, and at times your parent. To protect yourself, meet your own needs, and ask for help when you need it. Ultimately to love yourself is to take care of yourself. Taking care of yourself includes taking ownership and responsibility of your life and impact.
A few basics to (in my opinion)loving yourself
Embodiment. Learn to inhabit your body. In western culture, people condition others to disasociate from their senses.
Vision. Grasp your desires and ambitions. What do you want in this life, and how are you preventing yourself from attaining it? Become clear with what is important to you.
Values. Even the non-conformist and the rebellious have values. Identify yours and why you can’t live without them.
Impeccability of your word. Between you and yourself. Make decisions each day and follow through with them.
Consciously decide to implement these findings into a standard for your life.
These steps will open a relationship within yourself to harbor respect, trust, and open communication. You will align yourself and feel different as an individual. The nature of the relationship you carry with yourself is the groundwork to improve your relationships with others. When you adhere to the standard you set for yourself, it will help you identify relationships that are not healthy for you. Simultaneously this will invite relationships with others who are dedicated to themselves (love and boundaries) and respect the self-dedication in you.
I love you.
*To be said repeatedly, joyously, wildly, and passionately to yourself daily. Extra dosage if you sing, whisper, shout, and perhaps state it sternly to yourself as well all in one session.
- Laurën Blūm -